In the state of menstruation, it is permissible for the husband and wife to lay together, kissing and caressing is also allowed. However, to fulfil ones desires to the extent of having intercourse is strictly prohibited. It is also mentioned in the Holy Qur’an:
“O Muhammed, they ask you concerning menstruation. Say: it is an impurity, so keep away from women in their menstruation and do not approach them till they are purified.” (Surah Baqarah)
In a Hadith, the Prophet (pbuh) has mentioned:
“That person who has intercourse with his wife whilst she is menstruating or that person who has intercourse in the unnatural place (anus) or that person who goes to a fortune teller, he has refuted that religion which has been revealed to me.” (Tirmizhi)
Therefore in light of the Qur’an and Hadith, to have intercourse during menstruation in not only strictly prohibited, but a major sin. It has been mentioned in another Hadith:
“That person who has intercourse with his wife whilst she is menstruating should give half a dinar in charity.” (Tirmizhi)
In our terms fifty pence or something to its value.
Furthermore, intercourse during menstruation for both man and woman results in many severe illnesses. This fact has been acknowledged by doctors past and present.
If the Husband in an uncontrollable desire forces his wife to have intercourse even though she is menstruating, it is obligatory for her to refuse. If she does not do so, she will also be sinful. If the woman refuses despite the insistence of her husband, she will not be sinful, rather she will be rewarded for abstaining from sin and causing her husband to do so too. From those sins which Islam has classified as ‘major’, one of them is having sexual relations in the state of menstruation. If the husband due to his overriding passions finds it difficult to control himself then during the days of menstruation, separate sleeping arrangements should be made. Furthermore, both parties should continue to repent for this sin thus far.
Sahih Bukhari Volume 001, Book 006, Hadith Number 299.
Sahih Bukhari Book 06. Menstrual Periods
Narated By ‘Abdur-Rahman bin Al-Aswad : (On the authority of his father) ‘Aisha said: “Whenever Allah’s Apostle wanted to fondle anyone of us during her periods (menses), he used to order her to put on an Izar and start fondling her.” ‘Aisha added, “None of you could control his sexual desires as the Prophet could.”
[Fondle:To touch in order to express love or affection. v.caress, cuddle, fondle, pet, stroke, hold close, embrace, hug, pat]
The Muslims have complete scholarly consensus (ijma`) that it is unlawful to have intercourse during menstruation, because of the Quranic verse [ They question you concerning menstruation. Say: It is harmful, so let women alone at such times and go not in unto them till they are cleansed. (Quran, 2.222)] and the Prophetic hadiths. [ al-Majmu`]
The hadiths about this include what Anas (Allah be pleased with him) related from the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) that he said, Do anything, except intercourse. [Muslim]
And Aisha (Allah be pleased with her) said, The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) used to order me to wear an izar [f: covering between navel and knee], and would approach me while I was menstruating. [Bukhari and Muslim]
Ibn Abbas said that a man who has intercourse with his wife when she is menstruating should give a little in charity.
This is why the fuqaha have explained that:
1. It is permitted for both the husband and wife to derive sexual pleasure from each other during menstruation.
2. Intercourse is impermissible.
3. Direct contact between the woman’s navel and knees is impermissible.
4. Indirect contact, such as stimulation through a barrier (such as clothing) is permissible.
5. Direct contact above the navel and below the knees is permissible.
6. It is permitted for the wife to masturbate the husband, as well.
It is stated in the Fatawa al-Hindiyya:
It is permitted to kiss ones menstruating wife, to sleep with her, and to enjoy her entire body, except for that which is between navel and knee according to Abu Hanifa and Abu Yusuf, as mentioned in al-Siraj al-Wahhaj.[al-Fatawa al-Hindiyya, 1.39, Bulaq ed.]
Imam Tumurtashi said in his Tanwir al-Absar,
And [menstruation makes it NOT permissible to] approach that which is under the lower garment.
Imam Haskafi explain this in his commentary, Durr al-Mukhtar,
That is, between navel and knee, even without desire. Everything else is permitted.
Imam Ibn Abidin said in his supercommentary, Radd al-Muhtar (Hashiyat Ibn Abidin),
Therefore, it is permitted to enjoy the navel and everything above it, and the knees and everything under it, even without a barrier. It is also permitted to enjoy that which is between the navel and knees with a barrier [f: such as clothing], without actual intercourse, even if blood spreads all over. [Ibn Abidin on Haskafi on Tumurtashi, Radd al-Muthar `ala al-Durr al-Muhtar Sharh Tanwir al-Absar, 1.194, Bulaq e
Sexual Intercourse in the state of Menstruation: http://wp.me/p1dL2Q-nL